Footprints on Marina Sand

This vast expanse of sand — one end infinity, the other definity. What a quandary that life on both ends call me. My footprints get lost in the sand and many other footprints. The walk to the sea seemed endless.

Staring into the sea I want to be numb. But all I have managed to do is heighten my turmoil. Everywhere I look I see relationships, boy-girl, man-wife, friends, mother-daughter, brother-sister... relationships are everywhere. Just no longer in my life.

The animation of life here amazes me. Who would have thought the sea that everyone is sitting and enjoying had been there adversary on a fateful December morning?

The din of my daily life had been drowned out by the wind. It sings unintelligible haunting melodies in my ears. Somewhere flute music passes by. The watch shows me that it's time to go home. But I don't want to.

The unmarked graveyard of broken shells and unknown dead things remind me of the inevitable end. The definite end of things in life. Things of life. Of pain. Of a felt moment. And it also reminds me of loneliness. Of the fact that in this entire world, one feeling can't be shared with anyone; and everyone bears it like an albatross - desolation.

Snatches of conversation drift to me from all directions. I try to tune them out. Believe it or not. But they are encroaching in on this now-familiar loneliness of mine while I sit with my back turned to civilization.

Maybe this is what MY no man's land is all about.

Artificial lights are coming up as the day steps down to let the night entertain us. This sea doesn't roar. Even if it does it doesn't roar today. It's purring playfully. More like mirthfully. The sand-castles remind me of futility. Of how nothing lasts and yet how everyone tries to keep it 'forever'.

The salt-laden shoebite is a reminder of pain. To be felt anywhere anytime.

A child just wandered into my pointless reverie. The foot-high angel gave me a precious gift. A smile. An unadulterated, I-am-in-awe-of-life smile. And then, it walked away. Leaving behind a trail of dainty footprints reminding me of every little joy. Of how everything is just momentary. Fleeting. Illusioned.